MATTER OF PERSPECTIVE.

While walking by the corner of Tadioto and Moto-san Uber, I recalled some feelings a year ago when the people and things I thought would last long turned out to end soon. I was devastated. There were several nights spent meaninglessly and a whole lot of me decayed indescribably. But after many illogical posts and much time of cleaning, I realised it was about time for me to climb off the old mountain and drive ahead to the next ones. Because you know what? Sometimes, not having what we want is a blessing.

On my way of traveling the valley to the next mountains, there is this feeling that I'm sure every one has been through, the feeling of not belonging to here and now. This state of mind only rises up when I receive too much of pressure, so it's once or twice in a while, a while as in two or three months. Instead of fighting and denying, the only way I can let it go is to accept the existence of it, which is the fact that a person can be exceptionally weak at times. Whenever I start to sing the familiar song of 'I don't belong here', I sit down in solid silence and recall Midnight in Paris. How the main character living in 2010 had longed for a reborn in the 20s, and how a beautiful lady living in the Roaring 20s had desired a life back in the Renaissance. The lesson is, we tend to want 'that' while having 'this'. It seems to always be 'here' and 'there'. His 'there' is our 'here' and vice versa. For short, we stand at the top of our mountain and choose to only see the others' mountain tops. 

On this long go from one mountain to the next, I sometimes forget that my mind should be my best alley and chase after things that are way out of my reach. It's a tiring, challenging game of acceptance and suppression. Must it be denied or faced? Not every time the dime turned out as a win. [Insert lots of confusion here].. Then again, there are yesterday and today. So ok, the doubtful shadow can stay. But how it stays will be turned into a fun experience of balancing as on a bicycle.

I used to think certain people were born to belong to certain places. Now it's only a matter of perspective to me.